and I guess I’m feeling fine.
Today I’m 23 weeks and 5 days pregnant. I don’t yet feel ‘safe’ by any means, but I don’t think I will until I hold our precious little girl and kiss her beautiful little nose and fingers and toes. But I don’t feel the need to write about it anymore. I’m happy to verbalise it in real life, I feel comfortable with labelling myself ‘pregnant’ (yes, it’s taking me over 1/2 of a pregnancy to get to that point!!). I’m over the moon about this miracle of a life growing bigger and stronger inside me every day, we’re really excited and I don’t wish to angst about it or document it here at the moment in the written word.
Also, I don’t wish to turn this blog into a ‘pregnancy update’ blog (sorry, no offence to anyone who does weekly pregnancy updates saying how big their baby is in terms of a fruit or vegetable etc. etc. – but it’s just not for me) – I have a pregnancy diary for that (which I’m also quite lax in updating. I’m happy for now just ‘being’). Nor do I want to post bump updates – no-one needs to see my fat stomach…except me, the dogs, cats (who incidentally love lying on it) and The Husband. Or the window cleaner if he arrives unexpectedly. Nor do I want to turn this into a ‘mummy blog’ – as when the time comes, I think we’ll just want to get on with things quietly – with the help of a few trusted family and friends for advice (again, no offence to mummy blogs). So, there’s nowhere left to go with it here for now.
But my real point is, I started this blog as a way to document our IVF journey. At the moment, that journey is on hold whilst I’m pregnant, and probably will be until/if we decide to go for a number two mini-us (or if something – please no – goes wrong with this pregnancy). And I have no idea if I’d want to document it all again in this fashion. So, I’m calling it a day on the old bloggage for now. I intend to totally keep reading (and commenting/rooting for) the journeys of the wonderful women who I have been following for the last 18 months – some who are now mums with their miracles, some on their way – through pregnancy, surrogacy, fostering and adoption and others still hoping and persevering.
Thank you for reading and sharing in my blog over the last 18 months, praying, wishing us well and hoping on our behalf. I honestly don’t know sometimes how we would have got through things without such wonderful friends or this outlet. I’m also so happy to have ‘met’ such a wonderful and supportive group of bloggers and shared so much with you all. Lots of love x x x